Sitting at my desk with my kettle on my knees, I look out of my bedroom window. It is raining. The rain is falling against my window and the noise irritates me. This is the kind of weather that makes you want to stay under the comforter watching Netflix series all day long. Depression.

Unfortunately, I don’t have only that to do, I have to work. In telework of course, Covid-19 obliges. I have no desire to start working from home. So I am wondering how I ended up here, depressed on my chair like a dumb teenager who has just learned that her favorite band is breaking up. And when I am thinking about it more seriously, I come at the conclusion it started when I got dumped. Not because I’m heartbroken, far from it. To be honest, I didn’t really care much about my ex-boyfriend. But what I liked about him was what he did to me in bed. So, when we broke up, I didn’t have anyone to please me anymore. And it’s not in the middle of the health crisis that I’m going to find someone. So, to make up for my frustration, I took a job on top of my studies and now I’m overwhelmed. Perfect. Always getting into trouble without anyone asking me anything.

But how do the others do it? I guess I’m not the only one in this case. Break-ups happen every day. So, my friends, the single ones, are they also overloading themselves with work? Not sure, I’m probably the only sadomasochist to do this kind of thing to myself. « You’re super brave, » that’s what my family members often tell me. That’s nice, but I’m not sure it’s true. If I’m working my ass off to get away from my personal problems, isn’t it more out of cowardice? At least with all the work I have over my head, I no longer have time to think about what’s bothering me. But what about the others? Does covid-19 really have an impact on their sex life?

Couples decouple

According to a study by Ifop, this would be the case. After analyzing the testimonies of more than 3000 people, the results of the study showed that the confinement had indeed had an impact on people’s sexual life. According to some respondents, the new rhythm of life due to confinement does not go well with sex. Of course, spending 24 hours a day with your lover is beautiful in the movies, but deep down, it makes you want to jump on each other, or out the window (and not in the good sense of the word).

A report from We-Vibe, 1st manufacturer of connected sextoys for couples, shows that 78% of the couples surveyed bet that the number of separations would increase because of confinement. Well, I hope they were betting for real because they were right. I read that in some cities in China, the peak of divorces had reached the upper limit set by the offices. Being confined as a couple doesn’t work for everyone. Think twice if the opportunity arises. As if that wasn’t enough, confinement can also lead to a loss of libido. That’s what happened to Nora, a 22-year-old woman.

« I spent the first confinement with my ex-boyfriend. Our sex life was going very well before the health crisis, but I gradually lost my libido when it had never happened to me before. I was with my boyfriend all the time and it was getting on my nerves, I couldn’t stand it. On top of that, the stress caused by Covid didn’t make me want to have sex”.

Nora is not the only one to go through this period since a study done in May 2020 among French people showed that 44% of couples had not had sex during the previous month.

Bad for bachelors’ business

How about singles now? Those who don’t have a regular partner and find themselves looking in the mirror for company? It’s not easy for them either. But according to the Ifop study, 21% of singles have not opted for the mirror option. They would not have been able to stay alone and would have circumvented the health rules by going to find a sexual partner… at home or in a public place, but we don’t want to know.This is the case of Marc, who confided to me that he had several sexual relations with different partners since the first confinement.

 « I know I’m taking risks, but that’s life, I don’t want to stop living”.

When I asked him what he thought about the fact that some sex therapists recommend having sex with a mask, he laughed. « It’s crazy, even with a mask there are risks. I’d rather not have sex at all than have sex with a mask. And doctor-patient role-playing is too cliché for me”. As you might have guessed, he didn’t opt for this safety option (or any other).

Masturbation, the solution

I wondered if there could be a silver lining in all this. And by asking this question around me, I finally found it.

« Confinement allowed me to spend a lot of time with myself and to ask myself questions about my sex life. I rediscovered my sexuality and tried new things. Now I love to masturbate”, Marc confided to me with a smile on her face.

And speaking of masturbation, what about it? According to We-Vibe, the desire to masturbate has increased by 50% since the beginning of the confinement. The company also takes the opportunity to remind us that sexual pleasure can help us get through the crisis. Apparently, having orgasms strengthens the immune system, brings happiness, reduces stress and improves sleep. So, don’t forget to treat yourself. One thing’s for sure, everyone needs to unwind. That’s the solution Marc has chosen to adopt. What he told me made me laugh.

« If I had one thing to remember about my sex life during this confinement, it’s that glass sextoys are life. You should give it a try! ».

I admit I never thought about it. But if we continue to be confined…